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Tips for the Perfect Thank You Notes

Posted in: Wedding Planning
Tips for the Perfect Thank You Notes

The gifts are awesome. Your friends were very generous, and you really want to show your appreciation with your thank you notes. You are not Ernest Hemingway—do words not flow effortlessly from your pen? Has your thank you note muse deserted you? Now, you search cliff notes for memorable Thank You messages. Here’s a cheat sheet to inspire your muse.

The honeymoon is a treasured memory. As you unpack your suitcase, fight the dread of sitting down and writing the thank you notes. First, don’t view this as an impossible chore. Although you may have over a hundred notes to write, consider them gift by gift, not sparing the whole a glance. The task then becomes less daunting.

Plan Early.

Begin this important task when you start planning your wedding. Many free organizational programs are available online to help you track your gifts and the accompanying thank you notes. If you prefer to manage this leg of the adventure without your computer’s assistance, it is wise to include a column for gifts received and thank you notes on your guest list so that you can pen a genuine thank you—and not overlook anyone.

Now the fun!

Choose stationery that states your tastes and personalities (as a couple). This is an ideal opportunity to express yourself. The choices are overwhelming—but you’re on an enjoyable mission, and are passionate about the outcome. You might even decide that plain white or one of the many shades of ecru best says you. Thank you notes do not go out-of-style. If you stock up the minute the engagement ring slides down your finger, chances are good that you’ll use your entire stack, even if you later decide on a stationery that matches your wedding theme. There will be many occasions thrown in your honor that require thank you notes.

Couple – Use First Names Only.

If you personalize the notes, it is considered in bad taste to use the married monogram or the couple’s last initial until the knot is tied.

My trusty quill.

A roller ball pen (or that lovely monogrammed pen your love gave you for Christmas) in blue or black ink is your ticket to good penmanship. Don’t rush. Your penmanship may suffer. You’ll be doing a lot of notes between “I will” and “I do”, but make each as personal as you can.

Woe is me! What do I say?

Your note should reflect your relationship with the person who gave the gift. They’ll appreciate the sentiment even more if you reference their gift, and add line or two about how you’ll use it. Of course, a cash gift must be acknowledged differently. Here are a few examples for your perusal:

Dear Isabeau and Morgan,

Thank you so much for the place setting of our china. Your lovely gift completed our set, and you know how much we wanted this collection. We can’t wait to invite you to the celebratory dinner party we are planning to host. Thank you again for thinking of us!

Very best wishes,

Juliet and Romeo


Cold, Hard Cash. Faux Pas: Mentioning the amount given.

Dear Katie and Sterling,

We are so appreciative of your generous gift, which put us nearer our goal of completing our china and crystal collections. Thank you for celebrating our wedding with us. We look forward to seeing you in the very near future!

Very best wishes,

Isolde and Tristan


Lastly—a group gift. Send individual Thank You Notes.

Dear George,

Thank you for the outdoor patio heater. You know how much we enjoy barbecuing, and this thoughtful gift will enable us to enjoy grilling year round! How lucky we are to claim you as a friend. Steaks or salmon in the recently forecast warmth of January? Thanks again for thinking of us.

Fondest regards,

Heloise and Abelard

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